God, Are You There?

I was strong.
I moved freely and ate well with many others of my kind.

But...

I was restless because I seemed to be in a one-dimensional plane and unable to grow.  I explored every corner of my world, but could find no way to break free.  It was a good world, I tried to be content and pretend that I could not feel the other dimensions around me.

Then... all hell broke loose.  My world was destroyed.  My people split apart.  I was separated from the others.  Layer by layer, I became more and more isolated.  The harder I struggled, the tighter the walls of separation closed around me.

Everything that made me - ME - has been ripped apart.  What people see is a hardened shell.  Inside, all that is left is a broken, worthless, gooey mess of nothing.

"But God," my heart cries, "I was something; I was YOUR CHILD!  You loved me... Even now I KNOW you loved me ... once.  But YOU have destroyed me.  You left me.  I am no longer even recognizable as belonging to you.  I am an isolated, worthless, gooey mess of nothing inside."


This morning, I heard an almost silent whisper of an answer:  "A gooey mess of nothing inside a hard shell - but still alive... hmmm... sounds something like what one would find inside of a cocoon."

Stitch by Stitch - Javier Colon - a song of hope and faith.

Blue and black, heart torn out,
You uncover what's beneath my skin
There and back, there's no doubt, your touch is my medicine

I'll be okay, 'cause you heal me...

And I'll give you all my pieces broken
In your hands, there's nothing that you can't fix
My heart is frayed, my scars are open
So put me back together now, stitch by stitch
Put me back together now, stitch by stitch.

What you say, without words, resuscitates what was numb inside
So repair me, every thread of me, 'cause you're bringing me back to life

I'll be okay, 'cause you heal me...

And I'll give you all my pieces broken
In your hands, there's nothing that you can't fix
My heart is frayed, my scars are open
So put me back together now stitch, by stitch

I'm still afraid of falling, somehow it's takin' over me
Don't ever let me let it go...

There and back, there's no doubt, your touch makes me whole again

And I'll give you all my pieces broken
In your hands there's nothing that you can't fix
My heart is frayed, my scars are open
So put me back together now, stitch by stitch
Put me back together now, stitch by stitch
Put me back together now, stitch by stitch