Becoming One

We had an interesting conversation the other day, and it gave me fuel for a new post. My husband was skyping and he commented to the brother he was skyping to (a pastor, by the way) that he really appreciated the way we work together as a couple on Bible studies and various things we see in the Word of God. Just out of curiosity (and assuming the brother had the same relationship with his wife), he asked the brother if this was a normal state of affairs. The brother responded with sorrow in his voice that David and I were probably just that way because David had no one else to talk with about the Bible.

Now, anyone who reads my posts knows that I am no feminist. However, I was just a little offended by that remark. I thought, "Oh, so I am just filling in until someone better comes along? I don't think so!"

David was not complaining about our current lack of fellowship; he was commenting on something beautiful that has been growing in our lives. Something we believe God intended from the day he first created a woman. It does not matter how many men David has fellowship with, OUR relationship with God and OUR discussion of the Bible will NOT be sidelined.

From day one of our marriage, we have shared everything we get from the Lord with each other. We listen to each other, refine each other, confirm or reject new ideas using each other's Bible knowledge, and continually grow together. (One definition of being "equally yoked".) Our spiritual life is rich and full when we are working together; sparse and sickly when we try to have a "personal" walk that does not include our spouse. After all, "Can two walk together except they be agreed?" (Amos 3:3) We use this scripture as an excuse to cut off our brother from fellowship, when the question is in the context of a rebuke on Israel, a curse, and a punishment for Israel's sins.

Wives, if you are not sharing your spiritual life with your husbands, if you show no interest in the things the Lord is showing to him, then SHAME ON YOU! How can you possibly be his help meet if you are disconnected from the most important part of his life? If the "help" you provide is just meals and laundry etc., well, any hired hand can do that... you're just a free servant. There's a word for that.

After all, "And did He not make one?..." (Malachi 2:15 referring to Gen. 2:24)"...and wherefore one? That He may seek a godly seed." Wow! Why is it so important to God that husbands and wives become one? So that the children they raise up will be godly. If the husband is in his study getting one thing from his Bible reading and the wife is at her desk getting something else, and they never put it together, there is a good possibility they will end up on different paths. Sometimes to the destruction of the marriage entirely. Parents are not growing together, the children are not getting a unified message or picture of the Lord, and therefore are more easily led astray because "everybody has to do it their own way, so I'm going to go mine".

The "norm" today is an "every man for himself" philosophy in which no one really agrees with each other and truth is sacrificed for a moment of false harmony. (i.e. "Let's all just get along.") How much stronger could your children be in the Lord if, as they grow, they could hear and later join in the discussions between parents and therefore learn that the Word of God is a growing, living part of their life... that beliefs can change and be refined as we study God's word... and that we can therefore agree with our brother even if we don't see eye to eye because we don't yet know what God may reveal tomorrow as we study and continue to discuss His Word.

My sisters in the Lord, study of the Word of God is not for men only. Women see things differently than men. God made us that way for a reason. Your husband cannot get a full view of the Scriptures without you any more than you can without him. It takes both. We are not just the humble slaves, quietly taking care of physical things so that our husband can get "important" work done. We are, and were created by the God of Heaven to be his "help meet". Let us rise to the challenge.